Sometimes the in-the-moment sensation of a simple thing can jolt a joie de vivre that makes everything previous and future-unknown converge to a conscious physicality of ecstasy.
As fleeting as it is— catching a double rainbow in the rain, the life-scent of a flower at a funeral, an unexpected kindness given or received by a stranger, hearing a familiar voice reassure you—
can last a lifetime of appreciation. On this Thanksgiving, I contemplated giving personal thanks to everyone who has, knowingly or not, given assistance to me over the past year, or alternatively, to wax political this holiday on the American Way of Life (never enough thought on either of those subjects, and will continue so, in various ways in this blog).
But, today, forget the politics and gushiness-- a laid-back ode to the sexual body wins out.
Largely driven by fantasy, sex’s reality of the physical doesn’t always mesh with the urge (or the porn flick) it’s true. We’ve all experienced moments of sexual expectation that the physical exploration somehow failed us.
Like Andy Warhol’s
“ fantasy… is much better than reality…Never doing it is very exciting,”it’s sometimes easier to just fantasize—even while with someone-- than to be fully there with them, working hard for something we think should just come naturally.
“Ooops, sorry,” too soon?
"Will (he/she or I) EVER come???"
"Ecchhhh, wish she'd get that tongue out of my ear"
"oooohhhh , if only he'd give me just a little more right there ???"
But there are times ( some of us more naturally inclined than others) that the ease of letting go of /immersing into our senses surprises. To taste, smell, hear, and see our sex, and those with whom we’re with, are an epicurean delight beyond and yet deeply within us. Touching to feel. Feeling to touch, be it a carnal fuck or the intent of making love. Ahhhhh, do I hear a tantra coming on?
So, on this Thanksgiving Day, I give thanks and your- welcomes to my own sexual discovery. To the (rare, and usually humorous) relative calamities and the equally rare absolutes of pure euphoria. To the times I’ve yearned for so much more, that didn’t happen, and for those moments I shouldn’t have, but in fond hindsight, glad we did anyway (and those pleasures that just were as they were).
For all it gives, and will provide more of, when ready, I curtsy a simple and profound thanks to the sexual body. Now go, let our taste buds savor that stuffing…